You ever have one of those family members? They just do some of the craziest things that are completely "far out", and not in the good way? Well I have one of those family members. I love her to death, but, seriously? The things she does are so out of the realm of normal, I can't imagine what she has been thinking this week.
So there are some family members who want me to date. And when I say "some" I mean ALL. And when I say "date", I mean they want me to get married before I'm too old. That's a lot of pressure when I'm not interested in getting married right now. I have my goals. Serve the Lord. Praise the Lord. None of those have become necessary to need a husband to do so, so I stay single.
Well over the years I've had family give me their opinions of who I should date and who I shouldn't. I've had considering thoughts and not considered others... well a certain family member crossed a line. Actually! She drove so far PAST the line, It's a little dot in her rearview mirror!!
So I'm staring at my phone.
No new messages.
Just searching for better LTE.
The my, well "cousin" calls...
"Hey did you get my message?"
"What message?"
"I left you a message a few hours ago."
Mind you I had been staring at my phone all morning. Waiting in anticipation for my friend to get back to me. There had been no messages....
"No, I don't have any messages from you.."
"Oh, well, okay well there's this lady at work. And she has a son. And he's out of the military on disability, and he's going to the local college to get his little two year degree..."
"Really? Please tell me you didn't set something up."
"Well, not exactly."
"This is weird! how old is this guy?"
"He's 36.And I left a picture of him in an email."
"36!!!????"
Side note - I'm sorry but 36? My sister doesn't even hang out with people who are 36. And she's nearly 30! Okay there is this one guy - 35, and I would seriously consider it except, A) Married and B) Famous... so I mean, not going to happen... anyways, back to the story.
"Well what are you wanting me to do?"
"Um, I don't think its really going to be a good match, because he's kind of shy and doesn't have a lot of friends, (suggesting basically she wants me, and my 20-year-old friends to hang out with him) but I gave his mom your phone number so maybe you guys can meet at Starbucks sometime."
"YOU DID WHAT?????!!!!!"
That's right folks. My cousin gave some random 36 year old guy my phone number. This particular cousin by the way, she is paranoid about my safety, more so than my own mother. She hates it when I drive down to Costa Mesa for a worship concert at another church! And she gave some guy my phone number??????
Ha! If this guy ends up harassing me, I will surely change my number and make sure she doesn't get the update! Where was her brain? Who does that? It's funny in the movies, but this is real life! He could be a serial killer! And living in the area I do, it's very likely!! Not unfeasible! AH!
So there was that. And it scares me. Hopefully this guy is at least halfway normal, realizes that this is entirely weird, and doesn't ever call...
But that's not the only thing she did this week. This though, this was defiantly an attack from Satan and I don't blame my cousin at all. I mean, she could be less of an airhead, but her timing was not her own, defiantly the work of Satan...
So I'm like 5 minutes late getting ready for an important ministry thing I do. And she calls, when technically I should be on the road already.
"So I was wondering if you could do me a huge favor."
(here I'm thinking later today when I'm not doing anything, so I say,) "Sure."
"Well I might have left my keys on the ground, outside my car at the park and ride."
(she carpools to work)
"Oh, okay"
Now I'm freaking out. Because she has this beautiful, nice, expensive car and it's sitting at a park and ride by the freeway, with the keys just laying next to it. So I much out the door to get to the park and ride that's in the opposite direction of where my ministry thing is. But I'm like, better to be late than to have to deal with a stolen car. Well as I pull up to the park and ride, I start freaking out because I can't see her car anywhere, and it's really easy to spot usually because it's an obnoxious color! Well... No car. And I'm sitting there trying to think about what to do. I'm already 20 minutes late to ministry. Shoot- then I remembered! She changed her Park and Ride location!!! Praise Jesus her car might not be stolen!!!! So I rush, clear on the other side of town, thankfully not getting a ticket, (Though I did speed and probably deserve one.) and looked for her car. There it was! Obnoxious color and all! So I park and start looking around on the ground.
No Keys.
Now, I happen to have a set of spare keys for my cousin, because as you can tell, she is an airhead, so I unlocked the car and looked inside- and there they were.... sitting in the backseat. This entire situation made me over 45 minutes late to ministry and I didn't have to be. Not to mention the GAS I wasted this morning driving all over town!
Well yesterday I had agreed to sing worship for a funeral today, and this was all happening before that. I arrived late to ministry but I made it thought. Did my part when I needed to, even though I didn't get the sufficient practice time, and I also made it on time to the funeral rehearsal. In the end God is good and it all worked together. But my back is killing me from the stress knots. Why do I get so stressed out over the dumbest things?!
Anyways, like I said... That was an attack from Satan, but it would help a lot around here if my cousin wasn't such an airhead. I'm hoping I don't get stalked by this guy..."